Best Radio Ads Ever

File: best radio ads ever.mp3

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Collection of Larry's most memorable commercial advertisements

Transcript

One on no one out the stretch. And the pitch. Number 7:15. Number 7:15, Aaron Sellers with one man erring nobody else in the bottom half of the fourth inning. Henry A. Has hit number 750. That's the shot over the 385 time. Henry A hit number 715 in his first half game of 1974. The entire Atlanta brace ventures out to freedom. This crowd is going absolutely mad. Unbelievable. Henry Aaron on a doubting has driven his deep for Fairfield. I can hardly wait for Mother's Day. I told my wife the other day that my buddy Harley is going to get a fantastic Mother's Day gift for his wife. You see, Brightonbakers has this fantastic buy on a General Electric Pot Scrubber dishwasher. I told my wife that Harley could get this GE pot scrubber for $199.95. You know the model, the one with the cutting board top. Well, anyway, I said Harley didn't know if it was a good deal. My wife looked at me and said, that's a fantastic price. She looks so sad. What I didn't tell her was that Brighton Beakers is giving free a buffet skillet valued at $28.95 when you buy the GE pot scrubber. I told my wife that Harley was something else again for buying his wife a dishwasher for Mother's Day. Actually, Harley and his wife already have a GE Pot Scrubber dishwasher. Harley's going to get his wife a chair and a sofa from Brighton Beakers this year. Boy, I can hardly wait till Mother's Day. You see, I'm going to get the GE Pot Scrubber dishwasher and the free buffet skillet that comes with it for my w. And she thinks it's just Harley that shopping Brighton Beakers. Ain't I a devil? Howdy, partner. Gotta tell you about the best place to get your vittles. When you're tired of stoking the range at the home, just meander on down to Andy's Chuck Wagon in the Kmart Plaza in Ogden right there on Wall Avenue. Talk about tying on the feed bag. You just mosey on into Andy's Chuck wagon and eat as much as you want of the want for one price. Bring the family and enjoy the best cooking spread this side of the trail. Let the cows find their own way home. You and the family enjoy yourselves at Andy's Chuck Wagon in Ogden. You're warm outside now without a winter coat from blocks. But wait in a few weeks in order to go outside. You'll need to be inside a winter coat from blocks. Now the inside story blocks. Pre winter stocks of coats are outstanding. Feel like you're inside while you're outside. Go inside blocks for your outside winter coats now while they have a wide selection. Got that? The pre winter selection on outside coats now at blocks inside blocks outstanding. Let's you and I take a musical journey to the Bon Marche. Drive to downtown Ogden, turn off Washington onto 23rd street and park behind this door and then open the door. Enter the world of Bon Marche. Three floors of famous name fashions, appliances and furniture. And an entire floor dedicated to bargains. A full floor of women's beautiful fashions at popular prices. Bon Marche at 23rd and Washington in Ogden. Come discover the Bon Marche difference. Here's Ms. Chicken out to tell you about the Chicken Out Labor Day special. Yes, thank you. Chicken out has chicken and salads and tarts and pies and soft drinks and salads. Ms. Chicken out the Labor Day special, please. And baked beans and mini loaves and barbecue sandwiches. Ms. Chicken out the Labor Day special and Pizza Out. Chicken out has pizza special. Right. And they have a special for Labor Day. A free pie with every family bucket or party barrel of that good Chicken out chicken this Labor Day. A free pie with. Thank you, Ms. Chicken Out. Don't miss Chicken out on Labor Day. Right? Ms. Chicken Out. Right. A free pie with every family bucket or party. Through our doors. As to the pizza eaten people in the world, it's a grand opening of time at the Pizza Pie at a corner of a fifth of south and a main in the Brigham City where the best in a pizza and a sandwiches. You haven't tasted a pizza until you've tasted a pizza pie. Pizza. When he spoke the word Mary on that first Easter morning, a weeping Mary Magdalene beside the empty tomb knew the reality of the resurrection of her Lord. To each of us, the resurrection is a personal blessing. Through Jesus Christ, every individual now living, every descendant of Adam and Eve who has lived or will ever live upon this good earth, both the just and the unjust will be resurrected. As was our Savior. Jesus Christ opened the way to an ever greater blessing. Eternal life for those who keep the commandments of God. Eternal life means living in the presence of God throughout eternity and is the reward the faithful receive for living his commandments. I give my humble but solemn witness to you that these gifts and promises have truly been given by the Lord. Hello, Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. What was so amazing about Pavo Nurmi, the flying Fin, he couldn't fly and he came from dusseldorf. Finished. Hello, Mr. Know It All. How old is the oldest man? 145. He's 137. He's 145. He lies about his age to keep working. Hello Mr. Know It All. Do you know what you get as standard equipment on a Mustang too? Hey, you got me. You get an Easy on gas 4 cylinder engine, gas saving steel belted radial tires, 4 speed shift bucket seats and tachometer, all standard. I didn't know that. Mm. Which is the best selling car? Camaro, Firebird, Barracuda, Challenger, Javelin or Mustang ii? Well, Mustang II outsells all those other cars combined. Gee, I didn't know that either. Now that you know, stop in at your local Ford dealer. He's small car headquarters. Hello, the former Mr. Know It All. Hello Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. Now, what was President Teddy Roosevelt's first appointment? His dentist. He had a toothache. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What's the longest drive in golf history from San Diego, California to Augusta, Georgia by Johnny Miller in seven days? Hello, Mr. Know It All. Where's the Gaza Strip, Buddy? This is a family show. Hello, Mr. Know It All. Which American small car is all new for 1974? Oh, well it's the. It's the Ford Mustang II. Mr. Know It All. I didn't know that. And did you know Mustang II gives you a gas stingy four cylinder engine and a gas stingy four speed shift. Standard Camaro doesn't even offer a four cylinder engine and you have to pay extra for their four speed transmission. No, I didn't know that either. Well, now that you know, stop in at your local Ford dealer. He's small car headquarters. Hello Mr. Thought I knew it all. Hello Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. When it's 4am In Philadelphia. What time is it in Rome? 4am That's Rome, New York. Of course. Hello, Mr. Know It All. How long is the Orinoco River? It dried up six days ago. Oh, then how long has the dried up Orinoco river been? 18 miles without the headboard. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What is the weight of the Eiffel Tower? In tourist season? About 20 minutes. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What station wagon outsells all other wagons big or small? The Pinto wagon. I didn't know that. And when it comes to resale value based on a national average of nada prices, both one and two year old Pintos return more of their original sticker prices than Vega or vw. You know, I didn't know that either. Well, now that you know, stop in at your local Ford dealer. He's small car headquarters. Hello, Mr. D. Know a few things. Hello, Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. How long did it take Michelangelo to paint the ceiling of The Sistine Chapel? Four and a half years. Too bad he didn't have a roller. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What's the fastest service in tennis history? Forest Hills, 1962. You got pizza in five minutes, a hot dog in three. Hello, Mr. Know it all. Can you name the 50 states in alphabetical order? Sure can. Hello, Mr. Know it All. What car from a major U.S. manufacturer offers you the smallest displacement four cylinder engine for gas economy and outsells any. Oh, well, it's the Ford Pinto. I didn't know that. Well, did you know that all Pintos come with an economical four speed manual shift standard While you have to pay extra for it on a Vega? No, I didn't know that either. Well, now that you know, stop in at your local Ford dealer. He's small car headquarters. Hello, Mr. Know It all just left for his Ford dealer. Hello, Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. What was the capital of Abyssinia? It was Addis Ababa, Abyssinia. I'll be seeing you. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What was the longest march in history? 31 days. Never varies. Hello, Mr. Know It All. What do you know about car resale values? Everything. Okay, is a four door 1972 Maverick worth more or less than it was a year ago? Uh, well, let's see. A 72 Maverick four door is worth more today than a year ago. Over a hundred dollars more. Based on a national average of nada used car retail prices. I didn't know that. What's the best selling four door compact in America today? Oh, well now that's the Ford Maverick with room for family of five. Gee, I didn't know that either. Now that you know, Mr. Know It All, Stop in at your local Ford dealer. He's small car headquarters. I'm not answering that. Hello, Mr. Know It all here. The man who knows everything about everything. What baseball record does Greg Bruno hold an original copy of take me out to the ball game? Hello, Mr. Know It All. Who made up Abraham Lincoln's cabinet? Carl Schwab in walnut. Hello, Mr. Know It All. Can you tell me where the great plains are located? At the great airports, of course. Hello, Mr. Know it all. What compact car offers two gas stingy engines, a six cylinder and the smallest displacement V8 made by a major American manufacturer. Uh, well, that's the. That's Ford Maverick Mr. Know It All. I didn't know that. And did you know that the five passenger Maverick has more rear seat legroom than either Nova or Valiant? I didn't know that either. Well, now that you know, stop in at your local Ford dealer, he Small Car headquarters. Hello, this is the new Mr. Know It All. This is a game. A game you can play to test your powers of imagination. Ready? Begin. Listen to this. The scene you just heard was A, a discussion on Planned Parenthood or B, an early morning farm program demonstrating the sowing of wild oats. The answer is C. This old boy and me standing in front of a microphone making those funny noises. If what you imagined was more fun or more interesting, give your imagination 10 points. The Imagination Game, Part 2. Hold it. We've played games long enough. The point is, on radio, nothing is complete until you make it so. And we can make suggestions. But it's your imagination that completes the picture, exactly the way you want it to be. No other communications medium is so personal and so private without you. Radio is nothing with you and your imagination. Radio is beautiful. Why do you hate your mittens? I don't hate my mittens. Look, if you expect me to help you, you'll have to be more cooperative. Now, why do you hate your mittens? Turn up the radio, will you? What for? It'll drown you out and I won't have to listen to you being disagreeable. There are many ways to use your radio. You use it for accurate up to the second weather reports, instant communication of problems that affect you and emergency information, music, entertainment, and to drown out someone being disagreeable. Somebody answer the door. What did it say? Radio is beautiful in beautiful way. Radio is beautiful. Hello, this is your captain speaking. We have made radio contact. Seven thousand radio stations offer you every kind of music, news, entertainment and information imaginable. That's kind of them, isn't it? Great disasters of our time or how radio could have changed history's course. My name is General Custer, an ingenious gentleman. Although inclined to bluster, I am an awfully decent guy. We left this morning for Little Bighorn with little information we hadn't heard a discouraging word. So with no trepidation, we faced the whole Sioux nation. Say, mister, may I borrow your transistor? And that was sweet. Sioux played for General Custer. General, there are Indians in your area. So cool it. Scout, take this message to Captain Haines. Yes, sir. The Sioux were all around us in a warlike attitude. Great Scott. My brave young soldiers. I think we're being sued. But forewarned is forearmed, and none of us shall be harmed. I alerted Captain Haynes to follow us with planes. You accepted radio in 1876? Why not airplane? And you have to admit it's a dramatic way of demonstrating that radio is a good thing to have going for you. Not only for constant entertainment but to protect you in times of emergency and radio.
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